Friday, February 27, 2009

Random Post 1

Hmmm... I don't know why, but tonight I just sat down on the sofa, plugged in my earphones and started going through my list of slow songs. I have accumulated a lot of slow songs from different singers over the globe these past few years. I don't know about the rest of you, but what I love most about the song is not just the melody.. but the way the words make me feel inside after listening to the songs.

I wanted to be a lyricist once, but alas, I lack the way real lyricists are able to touch your hearts with the tips of their pencils. I, being the romanticist that I am, believe that they pen their songs as they sip tea by their windows, a notepad and pencil in hand. Don't burst my bubble, this is how I envision them to be, so in my mind at least, that's how they write all the lovely songs I listen to with my eyes closed.

Anyways, for this random post of mine, I have decided to translate random parts of the lyrics that I love most. None of the lyrics are in order, it's just random lines that gave me the most memories. For those reading, try guessing which songs I listen to! I won't be writing titles or singers in this post, it's a little piece of mystery that I want to keep... and it makes it more fun, muahahahaha!! ^^

So here we go. My list of 'Makes my heart ache' songs...

I want to ask the reason why I am no longer you happiness, but why did I just smile bitterly and said that I understand? Pretending to understand is because I am too afraid of the truth, as being thrown away to the side in the cold hurts more than losing you.

Don't come near me any more, my heart is in turmoil as you don't belong to me. I try to live each day with a replacement of you, but my heart keeps going back to you. God, please forgive me, who has never been able to leave the fantasy of him. But what else can I do, when the fact is that I love him too much?

Today we broke up. And you said that you wished that I would meet another better man than you. You are just like every other man. When was it that you just said that you loved me? Honestly, I don't want you to lead a better life. What if you meet a prettier girl than me? What do I do if you really forget me? I'm in so much pain, so much so that it feels like dying... as till now, I still love you.

The grey sky looks like it just cried, after leaving you I didn't become any more free. Our past has been forgotten by the needles of time. I know we both didn't do anything wrong, it's just that we forgot how to step back. I know that we both didn't do anything wrong, it's just that we'll both be better off if we simply just let go.

The wind gently blows, signalling the nearing autumn. I want to give my everything to you. Whenever I am with you, it feels like I can do anything. I pray that our love can last forever. I live for you, and I learnt that this is love.

I have been hurt by love again, but it's okay, I'll take it as a part of growing up. When I think of the past again, I am thankful to those who hurt me. I'm not someone who naturally loves loneliness, yet, I have been given more loneliness than everyone else. Even if you gave me the whole world, I still don't own anything at all. Love isn't warm, nothing is real, and only tears are the truth.

Sky, please send my song to her, who's crying in sadness. Let me be your life partner forever. You know how much I love you, only an angel can take your place. Only fate decides, this gentle caress of the heart.

I want to return to where we were, I want to see the world you see, walk in your dreams, as long as we are together I'll feel happy. I want to return once more, and never let you leave me again. This time, I will hold you closer to me. Would it still be too late, if I tried holding you back once more?

Did you know that the person in my heart is you? I only see you, I only want you, I only live for you. You are my world, please remember that. I know that the dream that I have always wanted to hold on to is now visible to me. I want to protect you forever. (Okay, I admit that this one when translated borderlines stalker talk... but it doesn't sound like that in the original language, I promise!!)

I wish I could just forget words like I love you, I'm the only one, I'm your everything. Happy memories always hurt in the end. I wish that the same name, that a similar face or voice no longer existed. The memories come flooding back to me when I reminisce, and I begin to cry again. I don't want anyone who isn't you... and I search for anyone with the same name, with a similar face or voice. I really want to hear you say you miss me, just from you.

Even though my heart hurts, I still smile like this. If it's you, I am fine.

I am willing to sacrifice for love, in order to fulfil this fairytale. But reality isn't always so, and the princess is left with a broken heart. The fantasy of the glass slipper tale attracts everyone. The prince never met Cinderella, the heavens haven't created the glass slippers. Believing in the illusion of love, the merging of love and fairytale. If the blissful glass slippers existed, if the heavens were willing to intervene, I would be happy just to be together with you.

Has the time to pay the bill of love come? And all that remains is the loneliness of the both of us paying our bills separately. Why is it that when I push the doors open, nobody comes to hold me back?

It is because the stars bore the weight of too many wishes, that the shooting stars fell so hard to the ground.

How can I forget you? How can I erase the you that I love so much? When our memories seen in our photographs smile so brightly? I want to be your man, why did you leave me? Did you really believe the lie I told you when I said that I was okay? It's okay if you don't love me, it's okay if you don't come back to me, just never forget that I love you.

Getting off at the wrong stop, is the same route as happiness that has left, who's to say that I'll be better off tomorrow? Regretting the heavy price of dreaming when it's too late. It's only when you get off at the wrong stop that you learn that those who are greedy always take the wrong roads. There's no point in worrying, I'd rather protect myself and take it that I never met you.

You finally told me about how gentle she was to you, and even though you still held my hand, I was no longer in your heart. I really understand, that you're not throwing out the old for new. It was me that never stayed by your side when you were lonely. Don't look at me and say that there was love, don't be sad. I am not sad, this isn't much. But why do my tears still fall? I don't understand too. Just let me go, let me taste freedom. There are so many memories, and your shadow will cast on my life. Don't tell me that going back together will be the best for us, breaking up now is better than you dragging us longer when you no longer love me. Let your hands go, let me start walking on. This is what will set me free.

We talk about what happens in the newspapers. We talk about what goes on in the neighborhood. But we never, not even once, talked about us. We talk about our friends, and about what we see on TV, but never about us. Most of the time, we were too immature but when we were supposed to be like children, we became too serious. Only when we reached the time to say goodbye that we realized the story that we should have held on to.

Now I know, that you were floundering like me, unable to sleep at night. Hold my hand, I will never let you go again. I love you, till the day I breathe my last breath. I love you, till the day I close my eyes. Thank you, for giving someone so underserving like me, a present like you.

A lot of these songs played important parts of my life at different times, I was exposed to them as I met so many different people and without them I would never have heard of most of the songs translated above. Pardon my long long rant, I just felt like it today. Sorry for any mistranslations of songs that are not my first, second or third language, I translated from memory, so please forgive me. This is how I remember them to be, and I guess.. that's just the way it'll remain to me.




awie or eiwa said...

Chonsa..U r such a romantic person..full of luv...^^

Anonymous said...

chonsa, i don't know the languages in your fav. songs it korean , english or japanese etc.., one thing is for sure , music is a universal language , and whether we understand the lyrics or not , as long as it touches our hearts, that's all that matters ....the heart understands , eventhough the mind dictates otherwise ...

I love the lyrics in your songs . They all touched my heart ..


Anonymous said...

OMG, I love them!!! Reminds me of JoongBo with almost every one that I read. You are such a romantic Chonsa.

felice said...

JAY CHOU!!! haha. I'm a diehard jay chou fan and i recognized 2 jay songs in there. is there more? i only know the lyrics in chinese, can't remember many of the english translations. jay has so many touching ballads. have you heard the one titled, "where's the promised happines",( or something like that), ftom his latest album? i tear up everytime i hear it.

Anonymous said...

...this is DEEP. you make me admire you so much more. (ako=run)

Lil' Sue said...

This is beautiful Chonsa..(^__^)
Deeply touched..

Tess70 said...

I'm new to this but I just have to find out about the scandal that happen in HOngkong, is there a chances you could tell me or us about it.(what was it all about)
Thank you for all the things that you do ,I'm having a hard time if thre's no English sub but finally just going to your site explain it all and the news about JOONGBO ,I'm a new fan and addicted to Hwang Bo song even thou I dont understand them.